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Are you buffering?

What do you do when you feel negative emotions?

Do you eat even when you are not hungry? or 

Do you spend long hours on social media without any purpose? 

Or do you do impulse shopping? 

One of the challenges that are keeping people away from reaching their dreams, setting higher goals for themselves, or confronting difficult people or situations is handling negative emotions. They start to feel fear, insecurity, scarcity, anger, or similar negative emotions. However, people don’t want to feel negative emotions. Therefore, most of the time, they intentionally decide not to feel them. It is because our brain is wired to avoid pain and to seek as much pleasure as it can. When people are in those challenging situations, they do buffer. 

Buffering is a general name for the things that you are doing to create instant pleasure for yourself and to avoid your negative emotions. It can be over-drinking, overeating, impulse shopping, spending a long time on social media, watching the news excessively, and so on. There are basically so many things that you can buffer. When you realize that you are doing these or similar activities not because you have planned to but because you are feeling negative emotions, you can say that you are buffering.

What is wrong with buffering then, if that is helping us feel better? 

Well, buffering is giving you instant pleasure at the expense of achieving your goals. When you are buffering, you are also losing the connection with your mind. Your mind is trying to give you a valuable message by creating those negative emotions. That message is an opportunity for you to grow. However, when you buffer and don’t allow that emotion, you are missing that opportunity for growth.

People believe that they should always be happy or have pleasure, otherwise there is something wrong with their lives. That is the reason why they are trying to avoid negative emotions and try to feel happy all the time. On the other hand, they also want growth but growth takes people to the next level in their lives through those negative emotions by showing them their limitations and opportunities.

If you have a purpose and goals, buffering will only create temporary happiness in the short run but will create more pain in the long run.

Watch yourself and see if you are buffering. Observe which emotion is triggering buffering?

What are you doing when you are buffering?

Let me know your thoughts on this in the comment section below and share this post with people you believe they will benefit from.

Have a great day!

Ferruh Tumer

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